Couples must realise that, conflicts are bound to happen in marriage. No matter how often you agree with each other, there will be those 'off ' days you would disagree about certain things.
You need to understand that, it is only human to disagree and like they say "We disagree to agree".During this moments of conflicts,
the way you both handle the situation will greatly determine how your relationship will go, even the slightest things could become escalated if not properly managed.
Conflicts are bound in every human co-existence, but how it is managed, is what makes the big difference. So when those little hitches arrive, here are some tips to help you manage them:
- Do not over react: It is important to stay calm when arguing with your partner at all levels of your relationship. Try to control yourself. Remember you are not arguing with a stranger, you are actually talking to the one you love or at least have feelings for. Even though you are angry, try to be in control of your actions. If you don't, things might escalate and then it could be too late to remedy the situation.So self control is key when conflicts arise.
- Mind your words: Words are like air, when you say them, you can rarely get them back. Mind what you say, harsh words sometimes could strike harder than a sword. Don't say hurtful words such as cursing,swearing or resulting to name calling, just because you are angry. You may regret it later.
- Communicate : Do not keep your partner in the dark. Learn to explain things. Do not assume he or she should know what is in your mind, your spouse does not read minds. Most conflicts can be avoided if only we communicate, effectively.
- Tolerance: To avoid conflicts in marriage, you must be tolerant.You should be willingly to let go of certain things, so that there will be peace and happiness. Without tolerance, conflicts will keep knocking at your door continuously. Learn to tolerate your partner, and give up certain things for the sake of love. Remember, you are two different people coming together from totally different backgrounds, that means, things can only work out when both of you learn to tolerate each other. Certainly, sacrificing for the sake of love should not be one-sided. It takes two of you to make it work.
- Resolve Your Conflicts: You do not need a third party in your marriage. Resolve your conflicts by yourselves. No matter how complex it is, most times a simple word like I am sorry, backed with actions could solve most of the issue. Even if you bring in a third party, you may still end up apologising to each other. So, why not apologise to each other, make amends and forget about a third party. It takes mature minds to get married and every conflict can be resolved amicably only if we want to. Whatever the issue is, be it money, sex, adultery, dirtiness, clumsiness, anger, disrespect, alcohol, addictions, name it, it is not new. Believe me as far as marriage is concerned, nothing is new. So resolve your differences by yourselves.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Disclaimer: Comments found here are entirely the opinions of the writers and does not reflect the views or opinions of Ify Arowojolu.